our dumb world

Ja, jeg vet at jeg tar av litt med to innlegg på en dag, men jeg har en del å ta igjen...
Har såvidt begynt å bla i the Onion's Our Dumb World, som jeg synes er fantastisk og hysterisk, og jeg kommer sikkert til å dele mer fra denne herlige boka etter hvert. Har bare sett på USA og Norden enda, men her kommer litt fra Norge (jeg prøver meg nok en gang på engelsk, siden det ikke er like gøy å oversette!). Det underliggende temaet er vikinger.


NORWAY:
suppressing the urge to chop you in half with an axe

Thegentle and self-composed Norwegians know all too well what they are capable of. Within each tall, progressive, and sensibly dressed citizen dwells a bloodthirsty Viking Warrior, longing to inflict the most grotesque atrocities imaginable upon the feeble masses.
Modern Norway, one of the world's most socially conscious democraties, has opted to repress its past, distracting itself by building safe, clean roadways and funding reliable public waterworks. But, O, how they long to feel the weight of a bloadsword in their calloused hands, lopping off their weakly limbs of a commoner, his warm blood flowing as the rivers of wine in the halls of Valhalla.
As the third-largest exporter of petroleum on the planet, Norway is home to responsible officials who recently decided to set aside a percentage of oil revenues each year in anticipation of a time when this finite resource will run out. However, at heart, every last one of them would trade all the accruing intrest in the world for just one night of fevered pillage, grimacing madly with blood-splattered faces as they hack away the enemy, resting for a moment to join fellow warriors in debaunched celebration, drinking from skulls filled to the brim with mead, and laughing heartly as they pick shards of bone from their long, flowing beards and toss them into a roaring fire.

FACTS>> FORGED IN STEAL
Official name: Kingdom of Norway Of Kicking Ass
Motto: Alt for Norge ("Everything for Norway, Including your intestines")
Energy: The Norwegian parliament is currently debating plans to rape and pillage the remaining oil deposits in the Arctic north
Relevance to U.S.: the smorgasbord
Tourist Sites: Most of Norway's thousands of famous fjords are too deep for visitors to see all the decapitated bodies at the bottom
Religious Activities: Lutherans: Attending services at beautiful, ancient wooden churches. Black Metal Satanist: Burning down beautiful, ancient wooden churches.
Thor vs. Jesus: Thor

NOTABLE NORWEGIANS >> HENRIK IBSEN
The country's most celebrated literary figure, Ibsen eqposed the disquieting reality behind the facades of Norwegian life in his plays "A Doll's House", "Hedda Gabler" and "Why The Hell Aren't We Stabing Anybody Anymore?"

Noen som kjenner seg igjen?